Saturday, July 10, 2010 ; 7:36 PM
Ever since i came back to Singapore from China.... So many things have happened.... I really don't know how to live my own life anymore..... Everyday, i have to put on a disguise.... everyday i have to act as a happy person...which in fact, my heart is all filled with sadness and sorrows....There are so many things that i have to ponder about.... Every single thing is affecting me... My life...My studies...It's all been affected..... Why must things like this happen when i wasn't around.... I really felt very guilty...While I'm enjoying my stay in China.... There are people in Singapore suffering.... I shouldn't have left.... I shouldn't have left Singapore for the sake of personal enjoyment..... I should have think for others and care about them....I shouldn't have been so selfish.... Looks like everything that i didn't expect to happened had happened....
To
you,I guess... you might not know that i have been liking you for a long time.... I guess it was really impossible for me to be with you... What i have with you is enough... I don't think we can go on anymore.... That was the limit.... I have hinted so much just to let you know... But it looks like you didn't get the hint... Only a few people know that you're the one i love... I'm gonna let that feeling of mine for you to go..... I can't hold it on any longer... It's fading... Go on and find your own happiness....
I wonder how will it turn out in future....
I wonder how will it affects me....
I wonder how will it change me.....
I wonder....
This isn't the life i wanted... This isn't what i had before....
i'm nothing without you.
